Picking Up the Rhythm

A couple of years ago, my husband bought me a book on how to draw north American Birds.  There is a list of colored pencils for each bird along with five illustrated steps.

It has been taking me about two months to get up the courage each time and to actually start each bird.

After bird number eight, I took an on-line watercolor lettering class and learned how watercolor paint works.  It is magic!

With such superb training, I gained so many techniques that it was overwhelming, and I absolutely loved it.

I singed up for the next class on drawing Culinary Herbs.  I broke down in the middle of it and could not complete the assignments.

After feeling really bad about that for weeks, I finally decided to take a break and quit beating up on myself.  

After a while, I realized that I was having to take in so much new material without having time to apply it on my own, that there was no more room.  Until I digested all the new material and made it my own, I was depressed and listless where I had felt so amazed at being able to learn how the magic works.

Finally, I drew some line drawings of daffodils from a handout at a Master Gardener workshop.  That felt OK.  So I went back to the bird I had started.  That felt OK, too.  I was able to finish it.  Now I feel that I am back on track.

I just had to find my own rhythm.

I will be glad to experiment some more with the techniques I learned, but I need to build my own foundation now.  This is an important step for me.  I am grateful to learn how I work.  Up until now, I just kept absorbing whatever I was told and did it.

I am grateful for the breakdown.  Now I can develop my own rhythm and let it guide me in my new field of drawing and painting.  I do not have to (nor can I) learn it the way my musical education was presented to me as a child and career-oriented adult.

This expression is solely for me, myself, a new entity I am only just now meeting.  

It is a gentler entity and my approach is also turning out to be more gentle.

I like learning this new rhythm.  It is giving me a totally new perspective on how to live.

© 2013 Kathryn Hardage

www.InspiredPractices.com